Many weeks had passed since I had entered into the Eternal White Forest. The journey seemed endless with its repetitive scenery as I continued westward. All I could see before me were pure white coniferous trees and hardly any other signs of life. This made hunting and scavenging for food difficult. Still, I managed to stumble across a small stream with several types of fish in its waters. Since I found the stream, I have been continuing my journey along its path, searching for other life. I had sadly not found anything thus far.
I made camp again near the stream as the sun began to set on this day. I fished for my dinner and collected more water to refill my water skin. After I made a small fire, I cleaned the fish and soon had them cooking over the flames. The fish in this stream were unfamiliar, but I had yet to become sick from them. They were also quite delicious! Māmā could have made a wonderful meal with these fish. She always had a good nose for ingredients and what to pair them with; I thought to myself as I remembered her home-cooked meals. My mouth started to water at the thought of even one of her simple rice balls. All thoughts ceased when I heard the crunch of a stick behind me.
I quickly spun around to look behind me, and what stood before me was a woman. She was dressed in purple robes and had long black hair. Her eyes were the color of a purple twilight, and her face was soft and round. Her features were small and dainty, like that of a doll. Her lips were full and flush. She was breathtaking. I felt my cheeks warm up as I continued looking at her.
“Nǐ hǎo Miss, what are you doing this far into the forest?” I asked the stranger. She cocked her head to the side like a bird and didn’t answer me. I moved to the side of my fire and patted the ground next to me.
“Would you like to join me? It will become dark soon and bring a chill to the air.” I continued to turn the fish over as I said my following words a little boldly, “I can share my food with you as well. I wouldn’t want a beautiful person like yourself to go hungry.” The stranger cautiously began to approach me, seeming to understand my gesture. However, the closer she got, the air around me seemed to warm up rapidly. How peculiar, could she be the person I am searching for?; I mumbled to myself.
Once she sat close to me, I handed her one of the fish that had finished cooking. At first, she didn’t understand what to do with it until she saw me eating my own. She then mimicked my actions and seemed to enjoy eating the fish. I then took a sip from my water skin and handed it to her to do the same. She sniffed it at first and scrunched her face a little in disgust before she, too, took a drink. We continued our meal in silence.
After we finished eating, I asked her the question on my mind, “Are you, by chance, a descendant of the White Phoenix? You radiate beauty like no other person I have met and give warmth to the surroundings around you.” She continued to look at me with a puzzled look. That was when I remembered the story of the White Phoenix and came up with an idea.
I gestured toward the fire and started making eating motions with the now cleaned-off stick that I used to cook the fish. Indeed, she will understand she is meant to eat the flames!; I thought, but she didn’t understand my gestures this time. I then grabbed one of her hands and placed it on my head. Her hand was soft and pale. It fits so perfectly in my own. She stared at me, perplexed by my wild hand motions. That was until I reached my hand toward the open flame to gesture towards the fire.
Her face showed genuine fear for my safety as he grabbed my hand and pulled me close to her and away from the flames. She pressed my head to her chest and held me tightly to her. I did not struggle in her embrace and lay silently there. My head was close to her heart so that I could hear the rapid beating of it in my ears. The rapidness felt almost frightening to me, which confused and concerned me. I tried to gently move out of her embrace, but she held onto me even tighter as if she were a mother keeping her child safe from harm. I continued to lay there in her warm and gentle embrace. Soon, the fatigue from a long day of travel took over my senses, and I fell into a deep slumber.
“Good morning,” said a light and pleasant voice. I opened my eyes in confusion and glanced above to see the same woman from last night.
“So you were not a dream…?” I said out loud without thinking.
“Indeed I was not. Although I am not surprised you had thought so”, said the stranger. The memories from the night before began to rush into my mind as I sat beside her.
“Wait a moment, you could have understood and talked to me this whole time?” I stammered out in surprise.
The stranger paused before answering, “My apologies for my deception, kind stranger, but I could understand all along. I only feigned ignorance to see what kind of person you were and to understand why you are here, hopefully. I hope you can forgive me. As an apology, I will tell you my name: I am Xia. What might your name be?”
I stared at her, wondering if I should continue speaking with her. I feel like I can trust her, though, but this confuses and concerns me on why I feel this was, I thought. I decided against the cautious thoughts and said, “My name is Yī nuò. I am a villager from Xī Bái Sēnlín. I am searching for an essential item to help my village.”
“Is that so? What kind of item would that be?”
I cleared my throat before, again, overlooking caution for my actions. Still, I answered Xia honestly, “I am looking for a phoenix feather. I need to find one due to a demonic plague that has begun to infect the trees in our village. When set on fire, they produce a toxic fume that will kill any living creature if inhaled for too long. Winter is approaching soon, and we are in desperate need of firewood. Would you, by chance, know where I could find one?”
The woman shuffled further away from me after I mentioned the phoenix feather. A glint of hostility and fear soon overtook her gaze. Her posture also took a more defensive form. She knew something clearly but needed to protect it no matter the cost. It is an honorable thing to do; however, I hope she may understand. I mean her and the phoenix no harm; I thought as I shuffled further away from her to give her more space.
I bowed low to the ground to her in apology as I spoke, “My sincerest apologies, Ms. Xia. I did not wish to frighten or threaten you in any way. Nor would I wish to do the same for the phoenix. I have heard tales where the phoenix feather can retain its heat for a long time, even after the phoenix has passed on. I am only slightly aware of the significance the feather has to a phoenix, especially if it is the one that has passed on its soul too. I hope you can forgive me and my ignorance.”
I remained where I was for a long time, to the point where my back and knees began to ache in pain. I tried to stay silent in both thought and voice. However, I began to wonder if there was anything more I had done wrong to her since she had not responded.
I dared not try to peek at her, but curiosity soon took over, and I glanced to the side to see her. She sat there with a star-struck gaze. Her hands covered her mouth, and I could see the top of her cheeks had turned pink. She looks adorable; I whispered to myself. She is the most beautiful person I have ever seen; I wish I could hold her face to feel the warmth radiating from them. After I muttered these thoughts, I heard her shuffle towards me and placed a hand in my hair. I felt a tingling sensation ripple along my spine.
"I thank you for your genuine honesty, Yī nuò. Many people have come in search of a feather before, and never once has someone revealed their true intentions. Let alone allow themselves to be vulnerable towards a stranger. You are quite naive but admiral and kind as well. If I may be so bold, you are very intriguing to me. I want to join you in your search for a feather if you will have me."
My heart began to race at the thought of being able to stay with her for longer. Without a moment of hesitation, I vigorously nodded my head yes.
"I am delighted to hear that. You may rise now, for we are now traveling companions! With that, we are now equals." as she spoke, her stomach began to rumble, "And if you could show me how you made such delicious food, like the food from last night, that would be most appreciated."
I snickered to myself as I finally sat up. Her face was covered again, and a lovely shade of a darker pink enhanced her beauty. I got up wordlessly and held out my hand towards her. Once she placed her hand in mine, I took her towards the stream and had her help me fish for this morning's breakfast. I then made a fire and showed her how to cook a fish over an open flame. She was enthralled by everything that I had shown her. We were close to one another during the whole time, and my heart raced during every second of it.
We continued our journey along the stream, casually chatting about various subjects and slowly getting to know one another. It made the time pass quickly and the journey much more enjoyable. This continued for many sun and moon cycles. Each day, we would learn something new about one another. I would rest my head in her lap each night and drift to sleep as she stroked my hair. To my surprise, one afternoon, she reached for my hand to hold. Since then, we held our hands together as we walked along the stream. Being with her felt like a dream come true, and I never wanted to wake up from it. One evening, as we were finishing our meal, Xia began to play with her hands and made nervous glances towards me. It seemed she had something on her mind and could not find the courage to tell me on her own.
I looked towards her and asked, "Xia, do you have something you wish to tell me? It is alright. You can tell me anything."
She played with her hands more before answering, "I want to show you something, not say anything if that is alright with you…"
I chuckled slightly and moved closer to her, "Of course, you can show me anything. You never have to hide anything from me if you don't want to."
With a grin, she sat up and moved closer to the fire. She then rummaged through a small bag on her hip. She took her hand from the bag and held it out. Whatever contents were in her hand remained a mystery because her hand was closed shut. She looked once more at me with a joyful grin and then threw the contents into the flames before us. I was initially shocked, but then wonder and curiosity soon took over.
"The flames! They are now green! How did you do that?" I asked in bewilderment.
"It is a complicated matter, but to put it simply, minerals in the ground can change the color of fire when burned. Isn't it wonderful?"
"It is indeed. May you show me more?"
Soon, the flames before us danced in different colors of the rainbow. It ranged from dazzling bright yellows to sapphire blues, shimmering pinks, and even a radiant white. I thought; Such glorious colors, but one is missing. Then Xia threw one last handful toward the flames. They erupted into a brilliant glow of violet. This color….It reminds me of something. I looked towards Xia then, her eyes transfixed to the glowing flame, and that's when it hit me.
"Your eyes. They are the same…" I whispered.
She looked towards me in earnest. Her eyes, open and wide, glistened in the purple hue of the light. All of her seemed to glow in the light. As if she were one with it and it with her. Like a moth to a flame, I was drawn closer to her. Her whole being seemed to call to me. My body tingled with longing to be near her. I glanced towards her lips and saw the sheen of light dance across them. I want to…I want to kiss her…; I said to myself.
"May I…?" I stumbled out.
"Yes, you can," Xia responded.
Without any further hesitation, she jumped onto me and kissed me deeply on the lips. I was lit aflame with desire. We danced along with one another like the flames beside us. We did not let an inch of air separate us. Soon, I was engulfed by all her being, and I never wanted to leave her embrace. Through the night, we explored one another. My purpose and journey through these woods have long been forgotten. She is what I needed and all I have ever wanted. Finally, as the moon was high, I lay on her lap again. As I held her upper thigh in blissful warmth, I heard her say one final thing before sleep came to me.
"I love you, Yī nuò. I hope we can continue nights like these forever", Xia whispered into my ear. A smile crept across my face as the abyss of sleep overtook me.
The following day, I was awakened by Xia aggressively tapping my shoulder. When I glanced at her, a finger was held by her mouth to tell me to remain silent. Confusion appeared on my face, and then I heard a loud stomping sound and the crunching of leaves and sticks. My muscles tightened, and my heart raced. Something was near us, and it was massive. Xia kept me where I was, even as I tried to get up, by keeping a firm hand on my chest. I assumed where her face was looking towards was where this beast was roaming. I heard more loud noises from the beast as it went along its path. It would stop every few steps and make a loud air noise as if it smelled something in the air.
Xia's body tightened before she screamed, "Run Yī nuò! Now!"
I bolted up as fast as I could, grabbed my pack that was close by, and ran as quickly as my- awakened body could take me. XIa ran close behind me, her voice constantly urging me to keep going and never to stop. We ran for several minutes, but it seemed futile because the loud stomping noises were getting closer and closer. My heart stopped for a beat as I felt myself falling to the ground from tripping over a large stick. I finally got to see the monster chasing us, which made my body ice cold.
What raced towards us was a sickly pale white bull. The horns atop his head, four in total, left large gouges in the trees as he hurtled towards us. Large puffs of dust appeared behind him, covering the pure white trees in dirt. His heavy footfalls left the ground under his feet open and agape. What horrified me most were his eyes. The sickly pale yellow eyes that look directly at me. There was a ferocious hunger in them that nothing could stop him from achieving his goal. An….an….an Aoyin!; I screamed in my head. They were known to feast on humans for their brains, and it looked like I would be its next meal if I did not get up soon.
It was too late to get up; the Aoyin was right on top of me. It stuck its muzzle towards my face and sniffed deeply. Drool began to come out from the sides of its mouth. He seemed to have found what he was looking for. His mouth opened wide, revealing rows of large, sharp teeth perfect for shredding apart their prey. Tears rolled down my face, and I opened my mouth to release my screams of terror. Please! Someone save me! I don't want to die like this! Please! Someone help me!; I pleaded in my mind, for my mouth could not form the words now. I thought about the people I loved: Māmā, Bàba, Si Yu, Mrs. Zhou, all of the villagers, and lastly Xia. My beautiful Xia. I wanted to spend my life with her and live in happiness. The mouth of the Aoyin had surrounded my head. Any moment now, it would close shut and chew my head off. I blinked my tears away and sorrowfully accepted my fate. Goodbye, everyone…I love you; I whispered to myself mournfully as I waited for my time to come to an end.
A loud, thunderous screech filled the air, and everything around me was engulfed in violet hues. The Aoyin removed its mouth from my head and screamed out in pain. The source of its pain was from a purple flame eating away at its back end. The flame continued to crawl along its body slowly and painfully gruelingly. The Aoyin and I turn to face towards the maker of the fire. What hovered before us was a radiant violet phoenix.
The inner body of the phoenix was a darker purple and fanned out to a light lavender color near the wings' feathers. Specks of yellow flame appeared at the wings' very edge. The beak and talons were the color of amethyst, and the eyes…the eyes I had seen before. I would recognize them anywhere; they were Xia's. I suspected she could have been a descendant of the White Phoenix, but seeing her eyes while in this form had solidified it. Shock and awe were the only emotions I felt at this moment.
Xia raced towards the Aoyin, attacking him with claws and flames. The Aoyin retaliated by using his horns to harm her wings and biting anything close to him. They battled savagely, like beasts in the wild. Neither of them relented, and both quickly became bloody and torn to shreds. Xia could not keep up with this fight for not much longer. She seemed to become more exhausted the more flames she extruded. The Aoyin did not seem phased at all and continued ruthlessly. I knew at that moment I had to help save her in any way I could. No matter the cost. I rummage around me, looking for my pack frantically. It lay not too far from my side, and I quickly dragged out the bow and arrows stored inside.
I saw that almost all the arrows were broken in half in the pack, most likely due to the Aoyin stepping on it earlier. Still, only one was in perfect condition to be fired. I only have one shot. I need to make it count; I said to myself as I got up and stood in position to fire the arrow. I saw them continuously fighting before I noticed that the Aoyin kept trying to shield his face, especially his eyes. I knew that was where I needed to aim. I held my breath, tried to steady my aim, and waited for my opening. Xia flung herself backward from the Aoyin, and then he glanced my way, noticing that I had gotten up from the ground. Now!; I screamed internally and shot the arrow.
The Aoyin let out a deafening screech before running in the other direction from us. Xia, noticing the beast's retreat, dropped to the ground in exhaustion. I ran towards her as quickly as I could. Her body was covered in blood, and large patches of feathers were missing. Her breathing was ragged, and her body was limp. She had expended too much energy in the fight.
"Xia, my love, please turn back to your human form so I can help you," I whispered gently. Xia took a deep breath and slowly morphed back into the form of a human. I quickly tried to stop the heavier bleeding in areas most vital to her, but I could tell she was losing too much blood. I still tried, though I couldn't give up on her. I glanced at her face and noticed she was trying to speak to me.
"Home," she said haggardly, "bring me home." As she spoke these few words, a beam of purple light shot from her heart and pointed westward. I picked her up as gently as I could and ran in that direction. I followed the trail she had given me, and soon, I noticed the forest began to change around me. There were no longer white conifer trees surrounding us. What surrounded us now were willow trees that glowed like the embers in a fire. Their leaves looked like a shower of sparks cascading downwards towards the earth. The beam of light led toward a huge willow tree. When we neared the tree, an opening appeared, and I cautiously stepped inside.
I first noticed the golden bird's nest that took up the majority of the space in the room. Inside the nest were different colors of gems in the shape of bird eggs. The walls of the tree held racks of baubles and trinkets. Many seemed as if there were even pieces of unwanted and discarded items from people. I saw a stand encased in glass by the back of the nest. Inside were phoenix feathers of many colors, including a pure white feather near the top. I couldn't lose sight of my goal now; I had to save Xia. The violet light seemed to point towards the large nest, so I climbed into it carefully while still holding Xia. She looked at me and pointed towards a jade-colored egg. I sat her down beside it and began to turn around to look for any medical supplies.
Xia weakly grabbed my hand and whispered, "Thank you, Yī nuò. If not for you, I would have never experienced the love of someone true to their soul." She then lightly tugged me closer to her for a hug. She kissed me on the head and then firmly on the lips before saying, "I'm sorry for deceiving you further, my love. I had to keep my lineage safe from any possible harm, no matter what. I hope you can forgive me once more. Please promise me to live your life well and be happy, my love. I'm sorry to say I can not go on any further; my body and energy are long past the point of being able to be healed." Tears began to stream down her face and mine as well. "I will never forget you, nor will any of my descendants. I hope one day we can be together again, my dear. I love you, Yī nuò, truly, I always will." She kissed me hard and firmly one final time before I could respond and soon lost consciousness.
When I finally came, I was surrounded by my bedroom walls and lying in my sleeping pallet. My pack was near the door alongside my father's sword and bow. Tears rolled down my face as the memories of my journey slowly came back to me. Everything that I had done and who I was with. Until the final words of Xia's words filled my mind. I lifted my hands to wipe my eyes, noticing a purple glow in my left hand. What lay inside, my only reminder of Xia, a purple phoenix feather.
"I love you too, Xai. I always will," I whispered to the feather before being consumed by grief.
As the flames swirled around me, its warmth caressing me as it turned my body and soul to energy for the next phoenix's life, I was reminded of her. Of her warmth. Of her kindness. Of her smile. Of the love and trust she gave to me. I remembered it all. Tears flowed heavily down my face. My darling Yī nuò is all I could think about in my final moments. Although our time together was short, being with her felt like an eternal bliss. She is the other half of my soul. It saddens me greatly that I must leave her like this so soon.
I wasn't ready to leave her yet. I wanted….I wanted to live my life with her. To be in her embrace and to look at her beautiful face whenever sorrowful thoughts filled my mind. I wanted to live alongside her and explore the world's beauty with her. I wanted...I wanted so many things. To do so many things, but now it is the time to regretfully let go and allow the next phoenix to live their life. Yī nuò, my love, I hope your life will continue with happiness and joy like you've shown me. I love you with all my heart and soul. I wish I may still be in your heart always, no matter how small it could get or even maybe forgotten. I thank you again for being in my life and showing me what true happiness, love, and compassion can be like. Thank you, my lovely darling, until we hopefully meet again…; I whispered to myself as the flames finally consumed me whole and left nothing but ash.
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